More on my condition

I remember that the hospital people told me that I would feel 20 yrs. older for a few days.  I can imagine feeling like this at 74, but I don't like it at 54.  I called the Pharmacy at AVH and Erica the pharmacist told me that the dilantin I am on for a few more nights will make me feel "dumb".  I hope by the time I am finished taking it, my brain will be healed and I won't feel so slow anymore.  Sometimes I have to search for the right word and I get a little dizzy for a few seconds, and my short term memory is not great.  That HAS  to get better.  I went over to see Cloud with Dana today and had a nice time brushing her.  She is totally calm and I never feel threatened by her.  Accidents happen and it was my fault for putting a bucket upside down on my mounting block.  I had planned on riding her bareback for a few minutes, to practice leg commands, etc.  When you are bareback and start to fall, there is nothing to hang on to.  Plus, I think the bucket bouncing around underneath her caused her to move away, so I really had no chance of staying on.  It's just too bad I couldn't get my feet down before I fell.  Then I would have landed on my feet and maybe scrubbed up my knees and hands.  I was asked by hospital personnel if I was wearing a helmet.  I hate how they look, but I think I am going helmet shopping before I ride her again.  I have worked with her so that she doesn't move if I bounce a big red ball under her, but I didn't think about working with her with a bouncing bucket.  I will do that when I am feeling better.  I am considering trying to find her a new owner and home, but I really love her and love being with her and I am really torn.  I guess if someone perfect walks up and says they would like to own her, I might do it.  I just am really ambivalent about it.  But I don't think there is a big hurry, because I won't be riding her for a little while.  I am not even driving yet.  TTFN