I had forgotten about this blog site. I don't think anyone ever checks this anymore. Since I posted last my mother died, I have had 2 more grandchildren born, changed my job and our dog died. Hmmmm...Lots of changes in about 3 years. Life just goes on, I guess. I have been having issues with...depression, I think. The weather in January was awful. I think it was the worst inversion/smog I have ever been in. I just haven't had the drive to exercise, clean my house, clean my car, cook, clean up after Christmas. The tree is in it's box, sitting in the living room. I put it up, decorated it, undecorated it and took it down and put it in the box. I don't know when I am going to get it through my thick head that if I want something done, I have to do it myself. If I want the bathroom cleaned, the bed linens changed, walls painted, yardwork done, it's up to me or it doesn't happen. We went to Tori's Wind Ensemble concert tonight and I was bored. I am bored with my life. We are starting rehearsals on The Magic Flute with the opera and I am looking forward to that, because it is never boring. But sometimes, I just want to go somewhere new and start a new life, and find new friends and a new man friend. Maybe this is my late midlife crisis. Or depression. I heard an interview with Kris Kristofferson and he mentioned something to the effect of, as he has gotten older, that he has more insecurities than he did as a younger man. I wonder if that's what getting older is about. Not being confident but unsure of yourself more and more. Oh my gosh, that would be like reliving my adolescense. What a drag that would be. Well, it's getting late and I am tired and I still have to put the clean sheets on my bed. I need a wife but I can't afford to pay one.